


You Can Lead a Moose to Literature but You Cannot Make It Read

by ReleasingmyInsanity



Series: Stories from the Cabin [1]
Category: Fake News FPF, The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (TV)
Genre: Domestic, Episode Related, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Married Couple
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-22
Updated: 2020-01-22
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:14:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22358590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReleasingmyInsanity/pseuds/ReleasingmyInsanity
Summary: “Jon’s sorry he can’t be here, but he’s out in the woods right now. Teaching a wounded moose to read.” –“Stephen” in the January 19, 2017 Late Show episode.Just a bit of “Stephen”/Jon fluff explaining that line.
Relationships: "Stephen Colbert"/Jon Stewart
Series: Stories from the Cabin [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1609456
Kudos: 11





	You Can Lead a Moose to Literature but You Cannot Make It Read

Stephen stood in front of the mirror, carefully gelling his hair and making sure every strand was in place. The other Stephen had let him know that he wanted him to make an appearance on his show to talk about the end of the Obama presidency. And Stephen needed to be ready.

“Hey Babe?”

Stephen glanced at his husband in the mirror. “Yes Jon?”

“I’m gonna go check on that injured moose we rescued and see how it’s doing,” Jon said. Gesturing towards the door with a book in his hand.

Stephen paused in his styling. “You’re going to miss him you know. He’ll be disappointed.”

Jon laughed. “I think he’s just jealous that he doesn’t get to see _his_ Jon all the time. Besides, if he wanted my thoughts he would have asked for them. He asked for you.”

Stephen nodded. “My Nation needs me. I’ll see you when I get home?”

“Of course, I’ll be back before you are.”

“Give me a kiss before you go then.”

With a grin, Jon slipped his arms around Stephen and kissed the back of his neck.

“Joooon,” Stephen complained. “That wasn’t what I meant.”

Jon was still grinning as Stephen turned his head to look at him. “That’s the only space I’m sure you haven’t put makeup on yet.”

“There’s no makeup on my lips, Jon,” Stephen said, pouting.

“Well in that case.” Jon reached up and placed a firm but chaste kiss on Stephen’s mouth. “See you later,” he said, stepping back.

“If you’re going to teach that moose to read, why don’t you use one of my books instead of that one?” Stephen asked as he turned his attention back to his hair.

Jon laughed on his way out the door. Stephen wasn’t sure why at first, but then it made sense. Obviously the books he had written, or yelled into a tape recorder anyway, were too complicated for a moose to understand. At least not while it was still learning to read.

Giving himself a last look in the mirror, and never noticing that Jon had put the book back on the shelf on his way out, Stephen headed outside to wait for the other Stephen to call.

**Author's Note:**

> Not only are there two Stephens, but there are also two Jons. The one who has a tunnel between his farm and Stephen’s desk, and the one who lives in that cabin and is married to “Stephen.” And Stephen is TOTALLY jealous of “Stephen” getting to see his Jon every day.
> 
> “Stephen” may be better adjusted now than he was on his show, but he still comes up with some very wacky ideas. Fortunately, he’s got Jon to straighten him out.


End file.
